e utters curses,

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▓ not loud, but deep, and r●eturns to mop the floor. I ●try to int

erest myself in

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an old magaz●ine, but my mind seems unable ▓to concentrate in a contin

ued effort; I re

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a●d, but my imagination wander●s away in an interminable circle witho?/p>

Collect from /

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坲t beginning or end. The cold is intense;▓ the blankets, thin and gray, affo●rd no protection.My who

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le body is shivering▓ and shaking uncontrollably as if in high fever,▓ my teeth ratt

le like castanets accompanying ●a Spanish fandango.I light a ci●gar and watch the smoke curl slo▓wly, lazily across the cell until it appears l▓ike a veil between the ceiling and th●e floor and finally settles over my couch like ▓a pale, transparent shroud. Evidently ther●e is no ventilation, but I continue to puff away●, hoping to fumigate and kil▓l the fetid odor in the cell. Everyt▓hing is still except for the [Pg● 38]occasional moaning of a sick man.Fina▓lly the electric light at the foo●t of the bed is extinguished, and I am ▓left in the dark.

I turn into bed with all▓ my clot

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hes, including cap and shoe●s, trusting in this manner to warm myself an●d in the hope of forgetting m●y troubles in blissful sleep.▓ But there seems to be no r▓est for me. As soon as a little ●heat radiates from my body, scores of bedbugs▓ are attracted and start a vicious, incessant c▓ampaign.When I am deceived into sl

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●eep by a lessening of their attacks, I am a●wakened by the cold air under t▓he canvas, which freezes m

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y back and forces me● to shift my position. Ho●rrible nightmares shake me with a s▓tart as soon as I

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am lulled into slumber.●My throat is parched as if sand had been my las●t meal, and I pick up the tin c

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atures, beaked ●nose, cru

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el mouth and yellow eyes m

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ake ▓him seem like some t

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ropical carrion-eating bir

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d.● I am so fascinated by

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up to get a dri▓nk; to my intense despair the rusty, ▓filthy cup has a leak, and all the wat▓er has tri

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that the cell, with it▓s massive[Pg 39] walls reeking with ste

maller, clos●ing upon me like an accordeon, u

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ntil▓ the cell door is as small as a keyh●ole from which I get the last gasp of▓ air; then instead of a

  • ir, an endles●s cool, refreshing flow of wate●r runs down my thr

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  • oward the cell door calling for wa▓ter in a faint, hoarse whisper

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. ▓ A keeper silences me with a gruff, impa▓tient voice: Where in hell do you think I can ●get it And I can hear th●e water dripping lustily from a fauce●t into a full barrel on the ground floor! I t

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▓ry philosophically to force my thoug●hts into past and pleasant memorie●s, but the present distress is so tyr●annical and overpowering that all the ▓physical, moral and intellectual suffer●ing of the world

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seems to be cen▓tered within the few square feet of thi●s dungeon.My via crucis has begun.I refle●ct with terror that my mind may not[Pg 40] wit▓hstand the strain of uninterrupted ag●ony, and suicide appear

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s as an easy solut▓ion. The absurdity of the impulse is evid●ent, for my death in this fil▓thy cell, like a rat in a hole, ▓would delight those responsible for my pre▓sence here; and furthermore it would

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shock a▓nd sadden those dearest to me. ▓ What is all my fortitude ▓and philosophy worth if it cannot

10 April 2014

Printing and glorious▓ sun! Sil

stead●y and concentrate my will at the most crucial, ●heart racking and desperate moment of my life ▓ Why should my trained mind crumble like a mat▓ch box and be destroyed under physical torture, ▓mental d

10 April 2014

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istress and moral humiliation ▓ Is not suffering the greatest of all tes●ts, necessary, purifying and regenera●ting Why not wait patiently ●and courageously for the day of reckonin▓g, worthy of the gods on

10 April 2014

Printing and typesetting industry

Olympus● I count my heart-beats to get an▓ idea of the passing of time.The minutes s●eem to have frozen on the fountain● of time; they[Pg 41] drip laboriously a▓s if each and every one of them r▓epresen

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